THREE POUNDS.

My new project=SUCCESS! Thank yooooooooooou, patience. haha

I'm only 12 pounds away from my goal. Holy balls, I'm happy.


Now, time for my midterm, then the gymmmm. Better update letter, but just so you know, I danced around my room in my underoos this morning, I was so happy. haha

Not toooo much to say...

I dunno if people even read this. haha. Eh, it's good for me emotionally, anyway.

Soooo, I weigh in tomorrow. I'll see if this "project" worked out for me. When, really...it wasn't a project. It was good old self-control. I ate normal portions, tried to stay mobile, and didn't weigh myself every 5 seconds and go crazy when it's mostly water-weight fluctuations. haha. The thing is, I didn't work out as much as I usually do, and it felt weird...but when I did work out, I had so much more energy, because I had time off. Soooo, it's kind of a tradeoff. We'll see tomorrow morning!

Midterms are this week. I only have one, and it's not gonna be too bad, so I'm not worried. It's tomorrow morning. Then, I have a quiz on Tuesday, theeeen it's pretty much nothing for a week and a half! Yay for Spring Break. haha. I'll have an essay to do over break, but whatev. I can't not do schoolwork--I like to exercise the mind too ;).

Yesterday, I woke up at 5:30, had my sausage egg and cheese biscuit with berries, and I went to the gym from 7-8:30. Did 5 miles, the norm, pretty much. Went to work from 9-6, then I went grocery shopping for a few things--vegetables, fruit, and dairy, mainly. I also bought some almond milk, because I want to try it.

Came home, made dinner (Butternut Squash soup and an egg white omelet), and watched an amazingly entertaining Penguins game. Studied a little for my midterm, and that was it.

Was gonna go for a 7 AM run this morning, but my body wasn't feeling it. I have work from 10-6, then I think I'm going to go running after work--it'll be warmer then, anyway.

I work a lot of hours this week, so that'll help with keeping active and mindless eating. I ate a Kashi cookie yesterday and maybe felt a teeny bit guilty...but Jesus Christ, get over it, Kelly. haha

And I found out that I can go to my sister's graduation! It doesn't interfere with my summer class or anything. I am SO EXCITED! < 33333.

Alright, time for some Kashi with almond milk. Good times. haha. Byeeeee.

PS. I have decided I'm giving up all sweets for Lent. God help me. haha

My body hates meeeeeee. haha

So, you know how I said that I was going to the gym yesterday morning from 7-9?

Yeah, totally didn't happen. Woke up with a sore lower body, including a sore hip, which obviously wouldn't work out too well. I walked around a lot on Wednesday night (5 miles, I wanna say? Probably more..and I hit the gym), and I walked up a lot of hills, so maybe that tweaked something, and then I slept on my hip, which probably aggravated it. Eh, I dunno.

The funny part? Didn't feel guilty. Because I have been eating so well and getting "non-exercise" (walking around all day, on my feet all day at work) exercise that I know I'm fine. Instead of the usual 5-6 days of working out a week I usually do, I'll probably only do 4 max this week. And I'm fine with it, because, like I said, I ate REALLY well.

I'm starting to realize how much weight I've actually lost. I was reading it takes a year or something to realize a 20-pound weight loss. Insane-o. I've lost about 80 pounds in a year, so that should technically take me 4 years to adjust, but I think I'm starting to see just how much better I look. I can wear a MEDIUM IN URBAN OUTFITTERS. Suck on it, haters. haha.

I watched "Biggest Loser" yesterday, before my Biochemistry class. Seriously love that show--motivates me like no other.

Had Biochem, then I took a bus halfway into Dowtown to Moe's to meet Karina for lunch. Had to make a pit stop at the Marriott, because I thought I was ABSOLUTELY going to pee my pants. haha. Ran into Matt Cooke and Pascal Dupuis (Pittsburgh Penguins). So random.

Walked around Downtown for about 40 minutes, then walked to Moe's. Had my tofu salad, no shell, no cheese, no sour cream...and added some broccoli, because I'm weird like that :). I love lunches with Karina. She's entering a bodybuilding competition, so we're both eating healthy, and it's kinda cool to have a friend to confide in about this stuff, you know?

Took a bus to work, got there early, so I bought some groceries (apples, my pre-workout vegetarian sausage muffins--SO GOOD, gum, etc.), then I headed to GNC to buy my Lean Shakes. So glad I did--not only because my "boyfriend" was working there, but also because it was the last day of the BOGO 1/2 off. Whew. Saved myself some buckaroos.Ate one of the new coconut Luna Bars. I thought I was having oral sex. Unreal good.

Worked from 4:30-9:45. I like being able to be on my feet the whole time, because I'm a naturally fidgety person. haha.

Came home from work to see Pitt winning against WVU (ALWAYS awesome), and a package from Urban! Got a super-cute tank and a gorgeous dress from there. Both are MEDIUMS :). Didn't take a picture of the shirt, but I got one of the dress:

  Ialso took this picture the other day, because (I'll admit) I think I look pretty. haha:

I still kinda second-guess pictures sometimes...is that really me? Crazy.

Well, today, I'm ACTUALLY going to the gym, then heading to work.
Then getting up at 6 AM on a Saturday to go to the gym before work. Ugh. haha.

Kashi GoLean cereal makes waking up early totally acceptable, though. So. freaking. Good.


Oooooh, and:

http://www.yumyucky.com/2011/02/bikini-body-challenge-i-dare-you-and-me-to-do-it.html

I'm doing this. And you should too. And you should read her blog, because I absoLOVE her. She's a big motivator for me too.


Weighing myself only once a week makes me excited for the week to pass. Lame, right? I'm hoping for a pound, but we'll see! I feel better than I have, and my clothes seem to fit a little looser, so we'll see.

Time for class!

Yeah yeah yeeeeah...

Haven't updated in a couple days...lemme see...

Monday: ate a well-balanced diet. Just had History and then bummed around, finishing my lab report and Biochemistry assignment and such. Went to Coffee Tree, got my obligatory skinny latte, went to the library to check out a couple books.

Went to the Pens game, and THAT was a clusterfuck. I couldn't get a bus home after walking for two miles in the freaking blizzard aaaand waiting for a bus for over an hour, so I asked the *every lovely and wonderful Karina Bharne* to pick me up and bring me home, knowing that I owed her huge, because it was teeeeerrible outside. On the bright side, I passed Sidney Crosby and Brooks Orpik. Cool deal. haha.

Stayed the night at Karina's, because there was no way we were making it to my house.


Went to class on Tuesday in the same clothes and soaked Uggs. Oh well. haha. Luckily, I had my OChem lab report and Biochem assignment on hand! I was so tired, but the day went quickly. Got some Bruegger's and a Caribou Light Latte for breakfast (oh my God, I wish Bruegger's had no fat or carbs or calories. I could LIVE off of that stuff. lfdkjskjdf). Had Biochem, Had OChem Lab, then went to dinner with Mary Jo (AKA "Mom").

We went to La Capella, because I had a coupon for a free entree, and La Capella is balls good. Had my heart set on a wheat timballo, but the sauce had chicken broth in it (LAME), so I got eggplant, which I knew was amazingly good anyway :).

Went to bed at 9:30 last night. Slept like a log. Didn't even care that I didn't work out two days in a row...mainly because I ate pretty well and infrequently.

Today, I went to the gym from 7-8. I only did cardio and I burned about 900 cals. Walked to Coffee Tree (over 2 miles...I love my coffee) and got my latte. Had class, walked to the bus stop, walked from the bus stop to my house, showered, ate lunch (Kashi Black Bean Enchilada!), then I caught a bus to Shadyside/South Side, because I had to return a couple things to Gap and Urban Outfitters.

And now, I'm here at Pitt, awaiting yet another bus to go to the Pens game. Two new players tonight--pretty pumped to see them play!

I told you all that I was starting a new plan--only weighing myself once a week, on Monday morning. I've stuck to that plan, and I actually feel less depressed. Water weight fluctuates so much that it's stupid to weigh yourself so much, I realize. My clothes are fitting better (actually some are getting bigger!), and I have more confidence, and I feel healthy--that's all that really matters :). OOOOH! Bought some Luna Bars at REI--they keep coming out with new flavors, and it makes me love them more.

If you've never had a Luna Bar, HAVE ONE. Chocolate Raspberry and Chocolate Chunk are my favorites :). Got the new Chocolate Coconut--pretty pumped to try that one. haha.

Walked a tooon today. And I'm going to walk from the arena to the bus stop, then from the bus stop to my house, which is probably another two miles or so. Getting it doooone.


Tomorrow, I'm going to the gym from 7-9, walking to Coffee Tree, going to class, meeting up with Karina for lunch (Moe's--I get the tofu salad without the nacho shell, cheese, and sour cream ;]), then work. Blegh. haha

Time to leave for the Pens game! Byeeeeeeeee.

Portion Control: SUCCESS!

Let's update on Friday/Saturday first.

I get to the gym on Friday, decide it's FAR too beautiful to run on a stupid treadmill, so I decided to run around RIDC Park. Well, that turned into running around Aspinwall pretty much, and I ended up running 6 miles. It's crazy how light on my feet I am now. It made me so happy :). I even ran up some steep hills, and wasn't even that pooped. woooo.

I then got a skinny caramel latte from Coffee Tree (seriously, I'm obsessed. It's like my candy...and I got decaf, don't worry), studied some History/read a little Jen Lancaster (my BFF), ate some veggies and tofurkey, and then headed to work. Worked until 10, then I got home and attempted to write some of my Organic Chemistry lab report...and it didn't go over too well, because I was preeeetty tired.

Saturday, I woke up at 7 (seriously cannot sleep in), had an egg white/spinach/feta omelet (Cedarlane, I love you), berries, and some coffee before hitting the gym. Burned a tooon of calories, because I hit all the ropes--treadmill, arc trainer, total body trainer, abs, AND strength training. Got Coffee Tree (yeah, seriously), and I went home and got ready for work. I worked from 2-10 and it wasn't too bad. I was kinda sore, but that's to be expected. Had Trader Joe's veggie lasagna for dinner...dear Lord, it was so good.

Came home from work, did a little of my lab report, then went to bed.

Woke up at 7:30 today, ate some oatmeal and berries, went to church with Pops, then headed to the gym. I was soooooooooooo sore when I woke up this morning. I lifted a lot yesterday, I won't even lie. Then, I lifted a bunch of stuff at work, so that probably didn't help. haha. Once I got to the gym, I was still tired and sore, but I pushed through, and did 6.5 miles! I knew Texas Sheet Cake was in my future, so I couldn't dog it. haha.

Got Coffee Tree, came home, worked on my lab report, watched the Pens and Hawks game, and then went to my grandma's for dinner. I worked super hard on portion control, and I pulled through!

Had a small portion of garden salad, some eggplant parmesean (not too much), and brussel sprouts for dinner, then a moderate piece of Texas Sheet Cake for dessert. I took small bites and ate more slowly and drank more water, and I felt fuller. It's not just a gimmick, I suppose. haha. I was offered more cake and some ice cream, but I didn't go for it. I did take home the leftover brussel sprouts, though, because I am seriously obsessed.

I honestly could have eaten that entire cake, if given the chance.

Tell me you wouldn't eat that, if offered. sdjflkdjslfjsdsj so good. I realized that it will not accomplish ANYTHING if I ate two or three pieces of that cake--I'd feel gross, and all I need is one piece. There will be many more days in my life where I can enjoy a piece of Texas Sheet Cake. That's my logic.

I know this sounds stupid, but I was really proud of my portion control today. I've eaten well ever since Wednesday, and I'm pretty pumped about it. And my stomach is showing it :).

Tomorrow is another pretty low calorie day, because I'm taking my mom out to dinner on Tuesday to La Capella, and I'm getting wheat pasta with mushrooms, artichokes, sun dried tomatoes, and basil in a garlic white wine sauce, which I'm sure isn't the healthiest thing under the sun...however, it's one of the healthier options on the menu. I'm hoping if I pace myself, I won't scarf down the whole damn thing. haha. Plus, I'll be going to the gym, so it's whatev.

Taking OFF from the gym tomorrow. I've gone for ten days straight now. Ugh. It'd be different if I took it easy a couple days, but I've burned like at least 1000 calories every time I've gone. haha. Besides having class and working on my lab report and a Biochemistry assignment, I'm going to amble around Shadyside, return some things at Gap and such, and then probably treat myself to Coffee Tree and some quality book time, because I'm lame. Then, I'm going to the Pens game! I don't go to bars and go out drinking--I go to hockey games. It's like therapy. haha.

I've decided that for Lent, I'm restricting myself to the computer and TV for two hours a day. Watch how efficient I'll be. You won't even REALIZE.

Alright, speaking of efficiency, this lab report isn't going to do itself.

Good night!

PS. Decided to stop obsessive-compulsively weighing myself. Weighing myself every Sunday starting today. Then, I won't go crazy with water weight and all that stuff.

Dear Lord, I would marry this weather.

For real. So gorgeous.

In the past two nights, I've gotten maybe 10 hours of sleep total if I'm lucky, so bear with me here. haha.

Wednesday was a clusterfuck. At least I thought it was. Turns out I have a bigger wiggle room for caloric intake than I thought. I usually only consume around 1500 calories a day, which is totally acceptable...however, if I'm burning that many each day, my caloric deficit per day is 1500 or more...uhhhh, that's probably too much. haha. Unless I'm trying to lose like 50 pounds, that seems like a bit too much. And I'm only trying to lose 15 max. However, I felt like BLAH on Wednesday, because I ate so much bad stuff. Damn me. haha. I mean, I didn't sit down and eat a whole cake (speaking of which, my mother made a RED VELVET CAKE WITH CREAM CHEESE FROSTING the other night. She is pure evil....and no, I haven't had a piece :]), but I ate a little too much trail mix (that stuff is ADDICTING...damn salt), a cookie, a couple squares of dark chocolate...it all adds up. I burned a lot of calories that day and yesterday, so I'm over it, but still. Get it together, Kelly. haha. I was hardcore studying for a Biochemistry exam, and when you're sitting in one place for an extended period of time, you tend to realize hunger more or you mistake boredom for hunger. Yeeeeah.

Yesterday, I was super good :). Ate about 1500 calories (I think a little less) and burned about that many too. I also did pretty well on my Biochem exam I think, so that eating wasn't totally in vain! haha. Work is annoying, but it definitely prevents boredom which prevents needless eating.

A really sad event: the assistant manager at my job passed away the other night and I found out yesterday, right before my exam. We didn't always agree, but I felt absolutely terrible--we did get along though, and shared some cute and memorable moments--we talked about circumcisions for 20 minutes one time. We don't know exactly what happened, but we are deducing it was a heart attack, because she had heart problems. She has two kids--8 and 12--and her husband was recently in the hospital for heart problems. Truly feel for those children. I can't even begin to think how they feel. When I found out, I told my mommy that I love her. I was totally shellshocked. She was only 44. So scary. She was an extremely sweet and thoughtful lady, and I'm keeping her family in my prayers.

Work was definitely somber last night--I mean, what do you say?

Came home around 10 and had to do some homework, even though I reeeeeally just wanted to sleep. Went to bed late, woke up early. You know.

Breakfast is my motivation for waking up early. Sad huh? But I really freaking love Kashi cereal with mixed berries. It's like candy to me, so I get excited. Whatever.

Speaking of candy, I'm trying to figure out what to give up for Lent. Last year, I gave up candy, and I totally pulled through. I was thinking of giving up sweets all together, but I would be a bitch for 40 days. I promise you that. My mom said you could "cheat" on Sundays, but then that's not totally "giving it up," is it? Weeeeak. Still trying to figure it out. I could be on my computer less for Lent or something...I dunno, we'll see.

With the weather getting nicer, I'll be on my computer less anyway. I have a couple days off of work next week, so I plan on going in Shadyside and returning some stuff to Gap and looking around, going to Trader Joe's (my utopia), you know.

Alright, time to turn in this assignment and then going to the gyyyyym later. And treating myself to a Coffee Tree skinny latte and a good book afterward :). Then, work. Fun fun.

This weekend, I wanna GO somewhere and run. The weather will be too nice to not, especially Saturday. I'm totally saving a surplus of calories for Sunday, because it's my uncle's birthday, and my grandma is making Texas Sheet Cake. Oh my God, it's so good. I'm going to be really good until then :).

Have a good day, everyone.

Sucker for "Steel Magnolias"...

I just can't help it. I'm an old woman at heart. haha.

Lately, I've been waking up at 5 or 5:30 AM to do workouts. I don't start until 7 or a little before 7, but I want to have time to digest some breakfast/coffee before I start my workout.

I finally tried my Morningstar Egg and Sausage-filled biscuit for breakfast this morning. Oh. Lord. SO GOOD. Sometimes, I love being a vegetarian. haha. Had some mixed berries and coffee too.

Worked out from 7 AM-9 AM. Did 80 minutes of cardio and about 40 minutes of strength training. I was sufficiently sore when done. Was going to only have a GNC Lean Shake afterward, but I walked to Coffee Tree and got a skinny latte. Couldn't help it. haha.

Had class from 11-5 (Biochem and OChem Lab). Had a tofurkey sandwich and some veggies in between. My Lab TA asked me if the veggies I had were for the day or the week. Sir, I am a vegetarian. The end. haha.

Went to Trader Joe's afterward and got some yummieeees.

Simply Lite Low Carb Dark Chocolate (how can such a yummy thing be so low in calories, fat, and carbs? Yummmm.

Luna Bars (cranberry ones are soooo good.)

Natural Peanut Butter (SO much better than all that processed shit. Buy some.)

Organic Tomatoes

Quinoa

Tons of soup (Butternut Squash and Sweet Potato)

Frozen mixed berries
--------------------------------------------
Had the quinoa and soup for dinner. So yummy.

Tomorrow is a 6 AM workout, COFFEE TREE SKINNY LATTE, class, then studying until forev :(. haha. Biochem exam on Thursday.

Starting Thursday, I think I'm going to have a steady work schedule. Lame lame lame. haha. I liked not having to worry about stupid customers and annoying quibbling among workers. I want to find another job, but I don't think any other job is going to be a lax about my hours. Yeah. I like that I get a discount on running shoes, Under Armour, and sports bras...and that I'm on my feet the whole time, so I burn extra calories! haha. I also won't be lolled into idleness.

Well, back to studying...and Steel Magnolias. haha.

PS. Florence + The Machines=best workout music evs. I seriously love her.

Valentine's Day is a jerk. haha

Yesterday, I ate soooo well. Worked out hard. It was sweet. Theeen, today happened. haha.

I burned a lot of calories yesterday, ate a well-balanced diet (oatmeal for breakfast, soup for lunch, low carb spaghetti and "meat"balls [I'm a vegetarian, so they're soy-city] for dinner, and some veggies and fruit in between), but then I couldn't sleep last night. It was weird. I went to bed at 10, woke up at 12, didn't go back to sleep until like 2, then I woke up again at 3, and I basically didn't get back to sleep. haha. At 3 AM, I had an Atkin's bar, because I was getting hungry. Probably shouldn't have done that. Whoops.

Had a protein bar and some berries before I went to the gym...and a whole wheat cookie. Yeeeah.

Then, I had a GNC Lean Shake afterward and a tomato (for potassium, because my muscles were sore). And an Atkin's bar. WHY are they so good? sldkflkjfd.

Went to La Capella with my grandmother and I had a mushroom sandwich with goat cheese on ciabatta. And zucchini fries. I mean, that's not too bad (could be worse). But, then I came home and had some squares of dark chocolate. It's Valentine's Day. That's my reasoning. haha.

My mother knows I'm on a diet, so she bought me VALENTINE PAJAMAS as a gift. Truly unique of her, I must say. She also told me that we're having Chinese for dinner. Nooooo. haha. Ditching the General Tso's Tofu and opting for steamed vegetables and brown rice. haha. I'll just have a low-carb day tomorrow.

I'm going to be busy most of the day tomorrow anyway, including going to the gym tomorrow morning, so it works out. Yeah.

I need to stop freaking out about food! Gaaaah. I'm not going to gain a pound in a day, unless I'm really ridiculous, and I just have to learn this.

Hope you all have a great Valentine's Day :). Time to get back to Organic Chemistry and Biochemistry. Fuuuuun.

I get so happy when I see a new episode of Grey's on Hulu.

Seriously, my life is pathetic. haha

Sooooo, last night I said I was going to only eat eggplant and brussel sprouts...and I also ate a piece of pizza. Yikes.

Felt guilty about this morning (shouldn't have, but oh well). Ate a well-balanced breakfast (Kashi GoLean and berries...and a Simply Fit Chocolate Cookie...THEY ARE ADDICTING. Don't judge.), and headed off to the gym (be glad I didn't indulge in cinnamon rolls my mom made right before I was heading out to the gym. They smelled so good. Rage. haha.) . I was sore and not totally feeling a workout...but, I'm glad I went! Burned 1350 calories :). Did 85 minutes of hardcore cardio (seriously hating hardcore on the total body trainer. GR!), and then 30 minutes of strength training. Was sweating SO MUCH. So gross. haha.

Went to the grocery store afterward...bought some yummy stuff:

Cedarlane egg white omelets (seriously, go buy them. SO YUMMY.)
Grape Tomatoes
Luna Bar (they have a new flavor! Chocolate Chunk.)
Atkin's Bars
Quinoa (so excited to eat it!)
Crystal Light fiber packets (make water so much more satisfying :])
Diet Swiss Miss Hot Chocolate (only 25 cals!)
Dark Chocolate (I might be obsessed.)
Kashi Chewy Chocolate Chip Cookies (My Simply Fit ones are almost gone :[)
Cottage Cheese
Frozen mixed berries (eat them in cereal and oatmeal. yum yummmm.)
Tofurkey

[Side note: I'm glad that I'm able to slowly incorporate things like chocolate and cookies back into my diet--but healthier options, not the processed stuff. And not freak out about it, like I used to. I still kinda do, but I'm  getting better!]

Got a Coffee Tree skinny caramel latte with my mama, got the car washed, and then headed home.

Once I got home, I decided to try on a bunch of clothes...just to see progress. You know. Pictures further down!

Then, I showered, and ate a yummy lunch (Trader Joe's vegetarian chicken nuggets and a bowl of butternut squash soup). Aaaaand that's about it.

Called my grandma today. She's my heart. We decided we're going to be each other's Valentines. Presh, right? haha. We're going to see her next Sunday! So excited.

My mom said that she got me a Valentine's Day present, but it's not edible. So weird. Dunno what it is. Probably a ridiculous shirt she found somewhere. haha.

Time to study/do a bunch of work. Laaaame city.

Church in the AM tomorrow, then gym, theeeen more work! haha. Mama is making me spaghetti tomorrow with my meatless meatballs. So pumped.

blue sweater from Gap. So cute.

Slutty shirt from Urban I'll one day have the courage to wear in public. haha. I'll just wear a tank underneath.

LOVE the pattern. From Urban.

Crazy handmade tunic thing. From Urban.

Precious lace cardigan from Gap.

Love.this.shirt.

How pretty is the back of this shirt? Urbaaaan.

My "skinny shirt." As in...when I can fit into this without a big muffin top, I'll feel successful. This is my sister's from sophomore year of high school, I think. wooooo.

That Eva dress from Urban I shared a link of the other day. Love it.

Tonight's dinner: Salad with a bunch of veggies (including asparagus and portobello mushrooms). Yum!

Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros.

Seriously. Listen to them.

Last night's Pens game was AWESOME. Jordan Staal (on my fantasy team, just saying) scores the winning goal with 18.4 seconds left in OT. Had enough time to still catch my regular bus (even though I had to sprint while holding up my pants. Seriously, it's not as easy as it sounds. Especially in single digit weather, thank you). Totally worth it, though :).

Woke up this morning, weighed myself. Same weight as I've been all week, meaning that veggie sub and chips did less to me than I thought. I'm such a lamer. haha.

Breakfast was a Cedarlane Spinach and Egg White Omelet. Dear Lord, go out and buy them. They're not too caloric (I eat them with berries as my breakfast every once in a while). The fat content is a little high, but I don't eat too much fat during the day anyway, so I can spare it. IT IS SO WORTH IT. haha

Had a debate that I was stressing over, but it was no biggie. I've found that with my weight loss comes more overall confidence--I just don't care what people think about me as much. It's a good feeling. Plus, it was 9 in the morning and I was still tired, so I didn't give a funk.

Gym from 11:15-1:45. It was a sweet day, because the gym owner told me that he sees how hard I've been busting my ass and that I look great and to keep it up! That made me want to work out even harder. When I'm at my goal weight (only 15 more pounds MAX!), I'm taking a sledgehammer and destroying every Total Body Trainer in my sight...or, I'll just work on them harder to show that bitch who's boss. Furreal. My arms are starting to get a little too defined (especially in the delts area), but there are still some parts that need worked on--you know, the "lunch lady arm" thing. I'm not trying to look like Jackie Warner here. haha. It's the hardest thing to get rid of, and mine's not that bad anymore, but I still don't like to see it. You know. Men get rid of it so easily. I hate them.

The guy at GNC and I were discussing how protein bars geared toward men are like 300 calories and up, while women's are usually around 200, and he was boasting about how great testosterone is to burn more calories, so they (meaning the male specimen) can consume more. At least I don't have to shave my balls. And I can use my boobs to get free things. I win. PS. Let's go on a date.

Anyway, I drink my GNC Lean Shake (seriously, BUY THEM. Sooooo good.), walk almost 2 miles down to the stupid bus stop, and take the stupid bus BACK to the city, because I want to see my Karina and lunch with her :) (I hope you realize the sacrifices I make for you, Karina. haha). I get the tofu salad with veggies (how can a plain-ish salad be so good?). The people at Moe's look at me weird when I say I want tofu on my salad and no shell, dressing, cheese, or chips. Not everyone is trying to meat and cheese it up, bucco. I miss Moe's Nachos. Karina said that when she's done with her bodybuilding competition, we're going to Moe's at some point and eating their nachos. I would make love to their queso. Haven't had it since September, I think. sdklfjslfkjdf. Moving on.

Get on the bus, get off at the bottom of the hill, and proceed to walk another mile up to my house. I feel like with all this walking I do, I should be -7 pounds. Ludicrous. haha. I get home and there are literally TEN deer in my backyard, grubbin on some poor excuse for grass. I gave them carrots. I'm a sucker. I'm showered and settled now.

No class for two days. NO WORK FOR TWO DAYS. Uuuuuuh, except I have a big Biochemistry exam and a bunch of Organic Chemistry homework and another debate to write. I hate being idle anyway, so this gives me something to do while I watch mindless television (oooh! That reminds me. "Jersey Shore"'s up on MTV.com now). I used to very rarely watch TV, and I don't really...I just catch up on the internet the next day or two. haha.

I'm also trying to get to Shadyside/East Liberty this weekend. Gotta return some stuff at The Gap (too big :D) and I wanna go shopping at Trader Joe's, dammit. haha. And, naturally, I'm going to the gym, since I rarely get a chance to go on Sundays, because I'm usually working.

So excited to spend time at home this weekend! Catch up on some sleep. Fun times. haha. I can't sleep past 8 AM anymore. I'm usually up at 7 when I don't even have to be. I get up at 5:30 or 6 during the weekdays, and it's not usually that big of a problem...if I don't go to bed too late. Yeah.  Gotta work on that. Thank God for coffee.

I'm treating myself to a skinny Coffee Tree caramel latte this weekend, dammit. So. Good. sldkjflkdsjfdlj.

Time for some Biochem and watching the Pens game later! Having eggplant and brussel sprouts for dinner tonight, and it's sad how pumped I am for it. haha.

Picture Time:

My workout garb today. Note that half of my wardrobe (shorts and hoodie) are my sister's. Shhh, don't tell. It's crazy how warm Underarmour Coldgear actually does keep you, for being skimpy tights. And Mizuno running shoes? Heaven for your foot.

PS. I THINK I AM GETTING A PUPPY. Brainstorming names for his cute little ass right now. It's probably going to be named after a Classic Rock figure...and no, I'm not naming him Rod Stewart.

Carrots.

Been obsessed with them lately. Better than being obsessed with carrot cake. Oh my God, I want carrot cake. slkdfjldjfdslkfj. Eating carrots/celery/peppers right now and watching "I Used to Be Fat." I've become obsessed with weight loss shows/memoirs. "Biggest Loser," "Heavy," you name it...yep. And Jen Lancaster novels.

Had the veggie sub and chips today. Luckily, they read my mind and didn't give me many chips. Thank you :). And my stomach didn't get that "OH MY GOD, WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME?" reaction that it sometimes gets when I eat the not-healthiest foods. It's not the worst thing I could eat...but...I obviously need to eat well the rest of the day. And I've walked most of the day and will walk later on tonight...soooo, yeah. Not worried. More importantly, it was so good to see my friend today. Hadn't seen her since like October. Such a crime :(. We HAVE to hang out more. I'm making it a point to see friends more. So, if you wanna hang out more, lemme know! She said she hardly recognized me, because I look so different. Pretty sweet. We had so much random stuff to talk about, and I loved every minute of it < 333.

I get to have lunch with Karina tomorrow--really excited! And don't worry--I'm eating a tofu salad AND I'm working out tomorrow morning too. haha.

Heading to the Pens game soon! Yaaaay. Bringing an apple and Atkin's bar for dinner. haha.

Sorry for all of the updates, but I'm lame.

Totally off-tangent, but I'd do Rachael Yamagata, if given the chance...

You know you would too! Half-Asians are ALWAYS good-looking. ALWAYS. haha

Cat Power is another one too:

Wish I could pull off bangs that well, Man

Sooooo, do I have anything absolutely substantial to say? Nope. But, that's my life in a nutshell.

I have been eating almost perfectly for the past week or so, so I'm pretty happy about that. The scale says I'm 154.8 or something, which, I'm hoping, is right! haha. I feel like I miiiight be consuming too few calories, but I dunno.I've also been drinking a lot more water (one of my New Year's Resolutions), and that's helped a lot.

I worked out yesterday, and it went pretty well. At least, my sore arms are telling me that right now :). I thought my hamstrings were going to be a huge problem yesterday, but I tried to stretch them out a decent amount between my workout on Monday and yesterday's workout. I think it worked. They hardly even hurt today!

My jeggings that fit really well a couple weeks ago are falling down a bit :). I don't even know WHAT size I am, because (ironically) sizing is not consistent across the board. I swear Target sizes their stuff smaller than other stores. A few weeks ago, I could easily wear a 12 at Gap and what have you, but I had to wear a 13 in Target jeggings. Jerks. I mean, my 13s are now too big, so it's irrelevant, but stiiiiiill. Does that mean I'm like actually a size 11 or something now? I don't know. haha. All I know is I can wear a medium at Gap and some stuff at Urban, so I'm bragging about it. SORRY. :). I got a dress the other day from Urban...I dunno if it's the outrageous static electricity or what, but my quads look like tree trunks. haha. It was clingy as baaaaalls. But the dress is so cute! I guess I'll have to wear it when it's not as static-y. This is it:

http://www.urbanoutfitters.com/urban/catalog/productdetail.jsp?isProduct=true&color=009&navAction=jump&parentid=W_APP_DRESSES&id=19227735#BVRRWidgetID
Presh, right? Right

So, I'm going out to eat with a friend today, and she wants to go to Fathead's. If you live in Pittsburgh, you know what Fathead's is. Not.one.single.healthy.option. Not one. And I'm not paying $345980 for a salad, when most of that money is for the meat that I DO NOT CONSUME. So, my only option, really, is the veggie sub. A lot of carbs. The sub is served with chips. Yikes. However, the rest of my day will be filled with vegetables/fruit and a protein bar/shake, so I'm trying to kinda compensate. It's her birthday lunch that I'm treating her to, so I'm not even thinking of vetoing--we all gotta make sacrifices. Plus, I've been working my booty off, so whatev.

I hate feeling guilty about eating stuff like this. It'll get better with time, but yeah. If I eat slowly, then I'll probably fill up more quickly and won't eat the whole thing in one sitting. That shiz is so good, though. And I eat like a hoover (totally bad habit). We'll see. I'm not gonna kill myself over it. If I didn't gain any weight over the holidays, I won't gain it over a stupid-ass sub.

I'm also going out to eat to lunch tomorrow with Karina, but I always get a salad with tofu and grilled veggies (thank you, Moe's, for providing vegetarian options), so I'm not even worried about that. haha.

I just realized the other day that I haven't had a pop (not soda) since like, August. Legit. It screws with my stomach, so I don't really miss it. Plus, I have an unhealthy obsession with white teeth, and that just screws it all up. Random.

Speaking of random, I have a crush on the GNC boy by my place of occupation. He asks me about these shakes that he recommended that I bought the other day (PS. Buy GNC's Lean Shakes. So. Freaking. Good.) and we went on a 3-minute tangent about calcium supplements, where he basically teased me the entire time. And he tries to always give me the best deal. And he smiles. And it's cute. And that's that. haha.

Started eating Atkin's bars. Only the PB Granola one, though--the other ones...holy saturated/total fat content, Batman. I know fat isn't a worry in the Atkin's diet, but Jesus...for one bar to have over 10 grams of fat and like 5 grams of saturated fat? I don't think so--that's almost like a candy bar! I feel like I eat too many carbs (which is hindering the tail end of my weight loss), so I'm trying to cut down, y'know what I mean? Yeah.

So, I think that's it for now. Gotta work on some Organic Chemistry stuff.

E-mailed my mother, asking for the cookies and dark chocolate for Valentine's Day. I'm such a hoot. Really.

Pens game later tonight too! Pretty pumped about that. I smuggle in my last meal of the night every game I go to. They don't check your boobs, I've realized this. Apple + Atkin's bar stowage. haha.

Listen to Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros. Do yourself a favor. Oh, and Cat Power and Rachael Yamagata. You won't be sorry < 3.

Random picture of me today: Cute shirt from Urban! My sister said that cinch shirts make you look bigger sometimes. All I know is that when I reach my hands up, my pants fall and you can see my grey skivvies.

Byeeeee.

Sleepyyyyyyy.

Why have I been so tired these past few days? I think it has to do with the fact that I have been eating fewer calories lately and I'm hungry when I go to bed, and I can't freaking wait to eat breakfast in the morning. I am a sad, sad creature. haha. However, the number on the scale...am in LOVE with it. I'm seriously only 10-15 pounds from my goal. I remember when I thought that number was unattainable. Unreal.

Valentine's Day is on Monday. My mom is a precious lady and always buys me chocolates or something. I hope she buys me Simply Lite dark chocolate with almonds and Simply Fit Choco Chip cookies this year. hahaha. Or this man:

Don't care that he may or may not like men--we can at least hold hands and laugh.

Speaking of, watching the episode of "Biggest Loser" that I missed last night. I really dislike Arthur, and I REALLY love the Purple Team. Precious to the max. That show really motivates me.

Coffeeeeeeee (sugar free creamer city). And Gas Chromatography Time.

Was I right about my body hating this morning?

Ab-so-friggin-lutely. I don't need a cup of coffee--I need a coffee enema. Lawd. Probably getting less than 6 hours of sleep contributes to that too. Whoops. Just as long as I'm un-sore by 11 AM tomorrow for my workout. haha.

Guilty pleasure of the day?

http://www.melaleuca.com/ProductStore/Product.aspx?sku=9241

I am OBSESSED with them. Not a lot of carbs, entirely whole grains, so my blood sugar doesn't spike, and one is filling enough. And hearty. And YUMMY. It doesn't taste like those ridic sugary chocolate chip cookies--it has a bran-like taste, but I really love it. And it's obviously not SO GOOD for you, but in comparison to Chips Ahoy and Nestle? Can't be beat. If you get a chance, get some! I only tried it, because I won a box in a Yum Yucky contest (yumyucky.com --go to her website, and you will instantly fall in love with her), and now I'm obsessed. And one cookie is DEFINITELY enough. That shiz is filling.


Same goes for Simply Lite Dark Chocolate with Almonds. A serving has only 2 net carbs and 110 calories. And no sugar. It tastes tooooo good to be healthy. But it is! haha. I could eat the entire bar in one sitting, to be honest, but 3 squares do the trick.

http://www.metrocandy.com/SIMPLY-LITE-SUGAR-FREE-CHOCOLATE-BARS?utm_source=googleproduct&utm_medium=cse&utm_campaign=google%2Bshopping

I have a feeling I may over-update this. I need to get back to actual schoolwork. Organic Chem Lab is calling my name. Wearing cute clothes today.

Look at those arms. Watch out, Jackie Warner. hahaha.

Alright, OChem Lab. Yes. Right. Almost Greek Yogurt Time! By the by, if you don't eat greek yogurt, you really should. Oikos is the most popular brand (and it is very good), but I SWEAR by Chobani, especially the raspberry and pineapple--however the pineapple has a little bit of fat in it. One of the best dairy products out there...second only to Ben and Jerry's Chubby Hubby, but I digress.


lfjdslkfjdsfkljsdlkjfdlsjflkdjfljADD. OChem. Byeeee.

Today's Exercise:

90 minutes of cardio (Jesus, don't ask me why. haha):
50 on treadmill
40 on arc trainer.

My glutes/hamstrings were dyyyyying.

10 minutes of abs.

Couldn't muster the strength (no pun intended) to do strength training today. I did some on my quads with the arc trainer, but my arms said no. And it's a good thing too, because I basically ended up working on arm strength at work today. I lifted like 30 boxes full of shoes, no lie. Ridiculous. haha

I was on my feet most of the day, and I EASILY burned more calories than I ate. I only ate about 1500, and I burned 1500 alone in my workout (bought a heart rate monitor---great investment, furreal). I think I'm hungry now, but I'm more tired than I'm hungry, and you're not really supposed to eat up to 2 hours before bed. Sooooo, I'm hitting the hay.

No gym tomorrow. I have class literally all day, and then I'm going to the Pens game! Yaaay. I manage to walk a lot, though, on days I don't get to the gym, so I'm getting some exercise. Low calorie day tomorrow--eating mostly protein. I went to GNC today to buy my Pure Protein Shakes after the gym, and the guys working there introduced me to Lean Muscle Milk, which is actually of higher quality whey protein, aaaand it supposedly tastes better. It has a little more fat, but it's mostly unsaturated, and I don't consume much fat daily anyway. I also bought some Atkin's bars, because I eat too many damn carbs. haha. I'm excited to try my new shakes!

Alright, bed is calling me. Night!

I don't want this to be just another blog about weight loss...

...but, it is. SORRY :). At this point in my journey, I only have to lose about 10-15 pounds left to lose, and if you're reading this, you might think "Vain bitch. 10-15 pounds is tough cookies." Wellllllllllllllllllllllllll if you'd let me FINISH, I'd let you know just how far I've come.

I was 250 at 20 years old. No girl should ever be that weight, unless she is 9 feet tall or a Sumo wrestler (but, the wardrobe would obviously have to be adapted. Diapers? Really.). I was not okay with it, but I didn't care enough to change it, I guess. I worked out pretty regularly, but I overcompensated that hard work with eating. What a feat, huh?

You know how there was that poll that came out (too lazy to check who actually published it), but most obese women consider themselves healthy, while most women in the realm of healthy weight consider themselves fat? For the longest time, I was part of the former, but I knew I wasn't "healthy." I thought I was overweight, but not morbidly obese. Buuuut, I definitely was. Looking at pictures now, it's like "The Blob" was being reenacted. Harsh...but true.

I didn't start being very gung-ho about my weight until about a year ago. I decided that I wanted to wear cuter clothes and maybe go on a date with a cute boy maybe once in my life. While the former has happened, the latter is a work in progress (it will happen...Bob Harper WILL call...and be a fan of the female sex. One day.).

I went to the gym about 5 times a week for 90 minutes or more starting in April of 2010, doing about 70/20 cardio and strength. What really worked for me this time is WATCHING WHAT I EAT. And when I say watching what I eat, I don't mean "Oh, look...a ho ho is being propelled into my mouthtrap." No, more like "put down the ho-ho lard ass, and pick up a celery stick instead." I began to take away processed food and saturated fats and replace it with whole grains, more protein, and good fats.

Well, it's now February of 2011, and I'm now at 158ish. 100 pounds: peace out. And if I see you again, I will karate chop you in the face. I worked my ass off (literally and figuratively) to get rid of you, and I'll be damned if I let you back into my life. We're through. DONE.

I was wary of posting a Before/After picture...but at this point, I don't look like that Beluga anymore, and I'm damn proud of what I've accomplished. The whole reason I started this blog was mostly due to a couple of books I've read recently--"Thin is the New Happy" and "Such a Pretty Fat" (one of the funniest/cutest books I've ever read. READ JEN LANCASTER.). They inspired me to document my journey. While it would have been more efficient to start when I had, oh, 100 pounds to lose, I'm going for the last 10-15, which is always the most difficult to lose aaaanyway (so, hopefully that makes for some interesting points...frustration and lashing out on my part, humor for you). And, for some odd reason, I've been having cravings more than I ever have in the past year, so I'm hoping some of you will motivate me to stay on track, dammit. haha

I've just started eating "good fats," because I was petrified to add them into my diet, for fear of spontaneous combustion (no, but really...just overindulgence). Peanut butter is my DOWNFALL. And natural peanut butter>>>>>>processed peanut butter. It's a bit of a drippy situation at first, but it's so much more fulfilling than the processed yuck yuck. Just saying. Also eating more raw almonds, because they actually do keep you fuller. I used to think 22 almonds in a serving? THAT'S supposed to keep me satiated? Yeah, well if you put them in cottage cheese or Greek yogurt, it's baller, so that solves that. So, if you're reading this, maybe leave some kind words or suggestions as to how to curve these stupid cravings for an entire pizza and half of a chocolate cheesecake ;). My body helps out in that department significantly, because when I start overloading it with bad stuff (would have been normal for my body a year or more ago, but it's TOXIC to my body now), it lets me know that it's hurting pretty badly. I'm a Hoover when it comes to food, though, so I need to learn that my food won't run away and it takes 20 minutes to realize fullness. So...slow down. For example, last night (Superbowl Sunday...don't wanna talk about the results), my mom made cheesy potatoes, stuffing, Eggplant Parmesan, and green beans. I could have eaten that whole cheesy potato pan. No joke. Buuut, I just had a spoonful to taste and ate some stuffing, a serving of eggplant, and a generous scoop of (healthy) green beans. And I was fine. It's sad, my love affair with food. haha.

Soooooooooo, the pictures. Oh yeah.

Before (Sophomore year, at my heaviest ever. 250):

 After (taken about a week ago!):

Just wanna point out that is a size large from Urban  Outfitters, and it's even a little biiiig. Just saying :). I didn't realize how much I had changed until I looked at those pictures side-by-side the other day. I look like a totally different person! I'm still the same person, though...only with more confidence :). And legs built like a running back, as opposed to the Michelin Man (seriously, no matter how much weight I lose, my legs are built like I should be running a pigskin up and down the field. I blame it on my dad's tree trunk legs--those things should be tested for 'roids individually). When I see people from high school and even from college, they are astonished with how I look--one of my  sorority sisters didn't even know it was ME. I didn't realize how much my face looks until I looked at those two pictures above. I have cheekbones, hellooooooo.

Only bad thing about losing weight is...nothing. My boobs are smaller (seriously, I used to be a DD...yikes), but my back is patting me on...itself. Yeah. I walk with a swagger, if you will. That swagger will score me a man someday, but I dunno if I'm even ready for a relationship yet. I've just started loving myself, you know? And I'm more important than a wiener and the emotional investment attached to it.

...I couldn't have made that sound more appealing. Okay, this lab report won't report itself, so I'm out like...I'm spent for similes.

Oh, and if you're wondering about the Janis Joplin-fied page...I've loved her ever since I was about 15, and she's my feminist hero. I basically wanted to be her, save the raging drug/alcohol problem. She was a peach < 3333.

Gymmmmmm later on today. I will report on the progress later. Bye, Kids.